I hate the Holidays

I can't be the only one, right? To me, it's just a giant pain in the butt. We have to go out and buy a tree, I have to decorate it, then I have to clean up the house for guests, and clean up after the tree, and then, when it's all over, I have to clean again. I hate cleaning, with a passion, so the Holidays just means I get to do something I hate for my entire winter break. I thought my winter break was supposed to be a relaxing time off from school. I'm always wrong! And you'd think that Anthony would be willing to help me, right? Wrong! He's always "too tired" after coming home from work. Don't you think I'm tired after running around after a toddler who's learning how to run, climb on the oven, desk, etc, as well as color on EVERYTHING with pens he finds who knows where, and cooking and cleaning? Plus, I am the only one who actually walks the dogs, while carrying the toddler on my back. Plus, he's bragged before about how all he does at work some days is watch netflix on his computer. Seriously? SERIOUSLY? And you want to tell me you're so exhausted when you come home that you can't even take out the garbage?!?! Not only do I have to clean but I have to go out and buy gifts for people with money that I don't actually have. I never know what to buy people! Of course, there are things that I know people would really like but they're always way out of my price range. Luckily, my sister and I agreed that we would just put a small cap on gifts for each other this year. We decided a ten dollar limit would be just fine for something small and cute. However, I went over the limit with her a little because I found something for $15 that is perfect for her. I can't even buy the gifts for Leo that I would like (a year long pass to the children's museum) so I think I'm going to end up selling some of my baby carriers to fund it. And to top off my Christmas Hell, we have to do Christmas at our apartment. Nevermind that my parents have a huge house with a full kitchen and a nice dining table that sits at least 8-10 people, and even more if you add all of the extenders to it. We have a pretty large apartment, but not large enough to comfortably fit 8 people plus Leo's highchair. Our table sat 5 people at Thanksgiving, and that was it. Leo couldn't even sit at the table, his chair was a little off to the side next to me. Oh, and since we're hosting, we're cooking...which means we have to buy all of the food. How is this fair?!?! I just cannot wait until January, when things will be back to normal and I can breathe and take a nap or something fun like that.

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This year has gone by so fast

Obviously, I haven't posted since Leo started walking, which was back in the summer. This semester has been living hell. My classes have been AWFUL and require a lot of work. I'm still working, and working doubles a lot of days. And I still have to be a mommy, first and foremost. I haven't had time for anything else (my house is a freaking mess!) Luckily, this week is finals week. I look forward to being able to spending more time with my baby boy (who is no longer a baby =(!). Hopefully I'll remember to post more often!! Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Walking!!!!

Leo is walking! It's been coming for the past month or so, so I've been preparing for it..but I didn't expect it to just happen practically overnight! He went from just cruising and holding on to Mommy and Daddy and walking to just walking around the house, holding his blocks like it's nothing. It's bittersweet. My little man is growing up and getting big! Yet, my sweet little baby boy is no longer a baby and is officially a toddler. Noooo!!

Harp Diapers Review & Giveaway!!!

As promised, I am finally posting another giveaway for diapers. This time, it's from someone I actually know and trust and have come to know as a friend. Not only that but the diaper is actually functional!

Deborah is the lovely mama behind Harp diapers, which is named after her adorable baby girl.  She's been  sewing her own diapers since she found out she was pregnant.  After she and I both had an extremely bad experience with another WAHM, she decided to open up her own online store to sell her cute, functional, and fully customizable diapers. Instead of pocketing the money she makes from her sales, all of the money goes into a savings account for her daughter.  Since she is a single mom with no support from the father, she plans for her daughter to have every opportunity available to her without any financial set-backs.  So when you order a diaper from her, know that you are helping to allow a beautiful baby girl to have money for college!

With her awesome prints, I was itching to buy a diaper from her for months but, luckily, I held out until she ordered my absolute favorite Snoopy print ever and I just could not resist any longer!  My first diaper was a hybrid fitted diaper, which has a fleece core making it virtually leak-proof for a couple of hours.  I was a little skeptical since I had never used a fitted before, I honestly thought they were pretty pointless since they aren't waterproof.  

She not only makes custom and pre-made diapers but also creates a ton of other things.  She is one creative person (I'm extremely jealous of her skills!).  She makes cloth wipes, blankets, hats and scarves, bibs, jewelry, mama cloth, and more.  Basically, if you name it, she can sew it.  I'm completely serious about ANYTHING you name, she can make.  Someone custom order diapers...for their dog.  

Look at these custom throw pillow covers!  Once I actually buy throw pillows, they will be a must-have for me!

And here are the doggie diapers!

I have this 100% wool sweater that was accidentally put in the dryer. It no longer fits me and would only fit a 12 year old so I'm contemplating asking her to turn them into longies or soakers for Leo.  Since I couldn't sew anything if my life depended on it, I'm glad I know someone who could do it and wouldn't charge an arm and a leg for it!

Finally, what you've all been waiting for, the giveaway prize!!  Deb is offering one person the chance to win the twin to this adorable Charlie Brown AI2 diaper!  There are only two of this exact diaper in existence.  I own one and you'll (hopefully) be the lucky one to own the other!!  

It is very hard to get a good action shot with a baby who likes to constantly be on the move!

The fit on her diapers is great!  There are four rise snaps and Leo is on the second to the top (on all of his other diapers, he is on the last row), which means he still has plenty of room to grow on the rise.  The elastic on the legs is super stretchy and gently so never leave red marks, which makes me happy since I know he's comfortable in the diaper.  And, since the diaper is lined in super soft minky fabric, I know his little butt is nice and dry (and it doesn't stain, yay!).  I'm pretty sure Leo thinks this particular insert is a stuffed animal; he enjoys hugging it and rubbing it on his cheek. Also, I love that she matches the top material of the insert with the inner material of the diaper; this means I can never mismatch inserts.  She also did this with my fitted diaper, which had an adorable and soft microsuede inner with stars and moons.  I need to order some extra inserts so I can actually use this as an AI2, or I can just line it with bamboo inserts.  However, this is his favorite diaper to poop in so I haven't been able to actually use it as an AI2 anyway!

See, no gaps and it leaves no red marks!!

In a very short time, these diapers have become my favorite diapers.  I'll be ordering more when I have more money and, hopefully, whenever I have another baby, I'll be able to order some cute newborn diapers from her.

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Having a hard time

I haven't posted in awhile. Things have been tough here in our little household. I think Anthony and I may be splitting for good. I love him, I really do, and he claims that he loves me but only sometimes. I found out he was cheating on me, again, only he doesn't consider it cheating. This is what he does: he opens a new email account, emails some girls on Craigslist (I don't really know if they live here or not), and then he chats with them acting like he's going to start a relationship with them. For example, one girl he was chatting with said, "I can't wait to start a family with you." to which he replied, "Me either, baby." He already has a family, with me and Leo. I don't understand why he does it. He says it's just boredom but he won't let me read the rest of the chats. I got into his email account and he changed his password right away. It just makes me think he's hiding something. He claims that if I don't believe him and don't trust him, there's no reason for us to be together. So, I'm heartbroken. Not only that, he just claims that he only loves me sometimes. He says some days he wants to be with me and, others, he doesn't want to be with me and dreads coming home. I get that I can be a nag and a downright bitch sometimes...but I thought the person you loved was supposed to go through that with you. I have no idea what to do. I am so depressed. He doesn't seem to understand why any of this hurts my feelings. He has no idea why I just can't trust him, despite everything he's done. He will not let me see those emails or chats, even though I've told him that's all I want from him. Everyone is telling me to just leave him but I don't even want to do that, even though I probably should. I never wanted to raise a child alone. I always wanted him to have a loving family and I feel like I'm a failure for not providing it to him. That's what hurts the most, that I have failed to give the absolute best possible thing for my son. I can't even afford to live on my own so I don't know what I'm going to do.

Happy Birthday Baby Boy!

This post is a day late. Yesterday (August 1st) was Leo's birthday. I just didn't have time or energy to write it. I can't believe my little man is already a year old. The time really flew by. I remember his first few days like they were just yesterday. It's amazing how much he has grown! I'd update with pictures but I'm just too lazy right now, maybe I'll come back and add pictures later. Anyway, Leo is walking now. Well, kinda. He's taken a few steps here and there and walked about 3 feet today before falling down. It's the cutest thing I have ever seen, and the scariest. I know how fast he can move crawling so I can't imagine how fast he'll be once he starts actually walking...I'm so exhausted as it is! His grandparents (Anthony parents) are coming in tomorrow morning at 5am and Leo's birthday party is Saturday. Wish me luck with all of that!!